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Alien Kindness and Gender Stereotypes

March 26, 2013 by cosmicgirlie 8 Comments

Yesterday on the way home from the morning school run, a car in front of me got stuck at a junction, on a hill, on the ice. There were more cars behind me, and other cars waiting to turn into our road. After about a minute of her wheel-spinning, and slowly rolling backwards towards my car, I got out and instructed her to take the breaks off and apply gentle acceleration, while I pushed her over the icy patch.

She was REALLY apologetic, and wouldn’t stop thanking me, like I’d just saved her life or something.

The thing that I didn’t understand, was that all the drivers in the cars around us bar 1 (there may have been 6 or 7 other cars) were all men. Not one of them got out to help us while we slowly got the lady up the hill and round the corner.

A she drove off, she was still shouting thank you, and still apologising.

A few junctions ahead, as she turned a corner, she stuck her hand out and waved, then disappeared down another road.

Sitting here this morning having seen her in the distance, I stil can’t decide which is weighing on my mind more; the lack of help from others, or how immensely thankful and apologetic she was.

Shouldn’t have to be that way.

Filed Under: Thoughts

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. @greythorne says

    March 27, 2013 at 4:53 pm

    Good on you for helping out. I was touched by the kindness of my neighbours – not just in my street, but the whole estate – in helping me when my car got stuck in the last snow. Snow shovels, newspaper under the tyres, pushing, advice on how to use the ABS thingy. Wonderful. I wanted to stop and hug them when the car eventually moved – but of course I had to keep going. Thank you for being someone like them.

    Reply
    • cosmicgirlie says

      March 29, 2013 at 3:34 pm

      Yes – YES. I had to do a few consultations this last week, and have seen people (usually in smaller roads, side streets and cul-de-sacs all shovelling drives and helping each other out. It's been a wonderful thing to see. I just wish it was more of a normal thing to see.

      Reply
  2. The Real Cie says

    March 28, 2013 at 4:56 am

    There is so much apathy in the world that actions such as yours are heroic, when they should be commonplace kindness.

    Reply
    • cosmicgirlie says

      March 29, 2013 at 3:39 pm

      EXACTLY. I don't want to be heroic, y'know? I'd rather just know someone isn't sitting in their car, bricking it over whether they're gonna be stuck and/or crash.

      Reply
  3. HerMelness Speaks says

    March 29, 2013 at 2:36 pm

    As The Real Cie said, your simple act of human kindness was probably heroic in a world I don't often understand. Stereotypically, I wonder how many of those men would have shifted themselves had the damsel in distress been buxom, with legs up to there and wearing a low top and a mini skirt? Although in this weather she would probably need de-icing first if dressed like that?

    Reply
  4. sarahhillwheeler says

    March 29, 2013 at 5:27 pm

    It's the small gestures that count. And actions sometimes speak loudest.

    Reply
  5. @coombemill says

    March 31, 2013 at 6:49 am

    pah to all the others who couldn't be bothered to help. I hope those men weren't quietly enjoying the show from behind their wheels!

    Reply
    • cosmicgirlie says

      March 31, 2013 at 9:23 am

      Nope; most of them were trying to avoid making eye contact.

      Reply

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